Reading section 2

Author: Yogananda, Paramahansa

Autobiography of a Yogi. By Yogananda, Paramahansa. This historical English edition is listed by Project Gutenberg as public domain in the USA. Read the source text, search passages, and explore it with the reading assistant.

Contents
  1. Reading section 1
  2. Reading section 2
  3. Reading section 3
  4. Reading section 4
  5. Reading section 5
  6. Reading section 6
  7. Reading section 7
  8. Reading section 8
  9. Reading section 9
  10. Reading section 10
  11. Reading section 11
  12. Reading section 12
  13. Reading section 13
  14. Reading section 14
  15. Reading section 15
  16. Reading section 16
  17. Reading section 17
  18. Reading section 18
  19. Reading section 19
  20. Reading section 20
  21. Reading section 21
  22. Reading section 22
  23. Reading section 23
  24. Reading section 24
  25. Reading section 25
  26. Reading section 26
  27. Reading section 27
  28. Reading section 28
  29. Reading section 29
  30. Reading section 30
  31. Reading section 31
  32. Reading section 32
  33. Reading section 33
  34. Reading section 34
  35. Reading section 35
  36. Reading section 36
  37. Reading section 37
  38. Reading section 38
  39. Reading section 39
  40. Reading section 40
  41. Reading section 41
  42. Reading section 42
  43. Reading section 43
  44. Reading section 44
  45. Reading section 45
  46. Reading section 46
  47. Reading section 47
  48. Reading section 48
  49. Reading section 49
  50. Reading section 50
  51. Reading section 51
  52. Reading section 52
  53. Reading section 53
  54. Reading section 54
  55. Reading section 55
  56. Reading section 56
  57. Reading section 57
  58. Reading section 58
  59. Reading section 59
  60. Reading section 60
  61. Reading section 61
  62. Reading section 62

“Our path took us to the edge of a tranquil field, where the rays of the late afternoon sun were still crowning the tall ripple of the wild grass. We paused in admiration. There in the field, only a few yards from us, the form of my great guru suddenly appeared! {FN1-9}

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“‘Bhagabati, you are too hard on your employee!’ His voice was resonant in our astounded ears. He vanished as mysteriously as he had come. On my knees I was exclaiming, ‘Lahiri Mahasaya! Lahiri Mahasaya!’ Your father was motionless with stupefaction for a few moments.

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“‘Abinash, not only do I give YOU leave, but I give MYSELF leave to start for Benares tomorrow. I must know this great Lahiri Mahasaya, who is able to materialize himself at will in order to intercede for you! I will take my wife and ask this master to initiate us in his spiritual path. Will you guide us to him?’

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“‘Of course.’ Joy filled me at the miraculous answer to my prayer, and the quick, favorable turn of events.

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“The next evening your parents and I entrained for Benares. We took a horse cart the following day, and then had to walk through narrow lanes to my guru’s secluded home. Entering his little parlor, we bowed before the master, enlocked in his habitual lotus posture. He blinked his piercing eyes and leveled them on your father.

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“‘Bhagabati, you are too hard on your employee!’ His words were the same as those he had used two days before in the Gorakhpur field. He added, ‘I am glad that you have allowed Abinash to visit me, and that you and your wife have accompanied him.’

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“To their joy, he initiated your parents in the spiritual practice of KRIYA YOGA. {FN1-10} Your father and I, as brother disciples, have been close friends since the memorable day of the vision. Lahiri Mahasaya took a definite interest in your own birth. Your life shall surely be linked with his own: the master’s blessing never fails.”

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Lahiri Mahasaya left this world shortly after I had entered it. His picture, in an ornate frame, always graced our family altar in the various cities to which Father was transferred by his office. Many a morning and evening found Mother and me meditating before an improvised shrine, offering flowers dipped in fragrant sandalwood paste. With frankincense and myrrh as well as our united devotions, we honored the divinity which had found full expression in Lahiri Mahasaya.

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His picture had a surpassing influence over my life. As I grew, the thought of the master grew with me. In meditation I would often see his photographic image emerge from its small frame and, taking a living form, sit before me. When I attempted to touch the feet of his luminous body, it would change and again become the picture. As childhood slipped into boyhood, I found Lahiri Mahasaya transformed in my mind from a little image, cribbed in a frame, to a living, enlightening presence. I frequently prayed to him in moments of trial or confusion, finding within me his solacing direction. At first I grieved because he was no longer physically living. As I began to discover his secret omnipresence, I lamented no more. He had often written to those of his disciples who were over-anxious to see him: “Why come to view my bones and flesh, when I am ever within range of your KUTASTHA (spiritual sight)?”

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[Illustration: Myself at Age six—see atsix.jpg]

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I was blessed about the age of eight with a wonderful healing through the photograph of Lahiri Mahasaya. This experience gave intensification to my love. While at our family estate in Ichapur, Bengal, I was stricken with Asiatic cholera. My life was despaired of; the doctors could do nothing. At my bedside, Mother frantically motioned me to look at Lahiri Mahasaya’s picture on the wall above my head.

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“Bow to him mentally!” She knew I was too feeble even to lift my hands in salutation. “If you really show your devotion and inwardly kneel before him, your life will be spared!”

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I gazed at his photograph and saw there a blinding light, enveloping my body and the entire room. My nausea and other uncontrollable symptoms disappeared; I was well. At once I felt strong enough to bend over and touch Mother’s feet in appreciation of her immeasurable faith in her guru. Mother pressed her head repeatedly against the little picture.

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“O Omnipresent Master, I thank thee that thy light hath healed my son!”

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I realized that she too had witnessed the luminous blaze through which I had instantly recovered from a usually fatal disease.

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One of my most precious possessions is that same photograph. Given to Father by Lahiri Mahasaya himself, it carries a holy vibration. The picture had a miraculous origin. I heard the story from Father’s brother disciple, Kali Kumar Roy.

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It appears that the master had an aversion to being photographed. Over his protest, a group picture was once taken of him and a cluster of devotees, including Kali Kumar Roy. It was an amazed photographer who discovered that the plate which had clear images of all the disciples, revealed nothing more than a blank space in the center where he had reasonably expected to find the outlines of Lahiri Mahasaya. The phenomenon was widely discussed.

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A certain student and expert photographer, Ganga Dhar Babu, boasted that the fugitive figure would not escape him. The next morning, as the guru sat in lotus posture on a wooden bench with a screen behind him, Ganga Dhar Babu arrived with his equipment. Taking every precaution for success, he greedily exposed twelve plates. On each one he soon found the imprint of the wooden bench and screen, but once again the master’s form was missing.

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With tears and shattered pride, Ganga Dhar Babu sought out his guru. It was many hours before Lahiri Mahasaya broke his silence with a pregnant comment:

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“I am Spirit. Can your camera reflect the omnipresent Invisible?”

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“I see it cannot! But, Holy Sir, I lovingly desire a picture of the bodily temple where alone, to my narrow vision, that Spirit appears fully to dwell.”

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“Come, then, tomorrow morning. I will pose for you.”

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Again the photographer focused his camera. This time the sacred figure, not cloaked with mysterious imperceptibility, was sharp on the plate. The master never posed for another picture; at least, I have seen none.

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The photograph is reproduced in this book. Lahiri Mahasaya’s fair features, of a universal cast, hardly suggest to what race he belonged. His intense joy of God-communion is slightly revealed in a somewhat enigmatic smile. His eyes, half open to denote a nominal direction on the outer world, are half closed also. Completely oblivious to the poor lures of the earth, he was fully awake at all times to the spiritual problems of seekers who approached for his bounty.

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Shortly after my healing through the potency of the guru’s picture, I had an influential spiritual vision. Sitting on my bed one morning, I fell into a deep reverie.

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“What is behind the darkness of closed eyes?” This probing thought came powerfully into my mind. An immense flash of light at once manifested to my inward gaze. Divine shapes of saints, sitting in meditation posture in mountain caves, formed like miniature cinema pictures on the large screen of radiance within my forehead.

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“Who are you?” I spoke aloud.

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“We are the Himalayan yogis.” The celestial response is difficult to describe; my heart was thrilled.

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“Ah, I long to go to the Himalayas and become like you!” The vision vanished, but the silvery beams expanded in ever-widening circles to infinity.

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“What is this wondrous glow?”

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“I am Iswara.{FN1-11} I am Light.” The voice was as murmuring clouds.

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“I want to be one with Thee!”

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Out of the slow dwindling of my divine ecstasy, I salvaged a permanent legacy of inspiration to seek God. “He is eternal, ever-new Joy!” This memory persisted long after the day of rapture.

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Another early recollection is outstanding; and literally so, for I bear the scar to this day. My elder sister Uma and I were seated in the early morning under a NEEM tree in our Gorakhpur compound. She was helping me with a Bengali primer, what time I could spare my gaze from the near-by parrots eating ripe margosa fruit. Uma complained of a boil on her leg, and fetched a jar of ointment. I smeared a bit of the salve on my forearm.

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“Why do you use medicine on a healthy arm?”

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“Well, Sis, I feel I am going to have a boil tomorrow. I am testing your ointment on the spot where the boil will appear.”

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“You little liar!”

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“Sis, don’t call me a liar until you see what happens in the morning.” Indignation filled me.

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Uma was unimpressed, and thrice repeated her taunt. An adamant resolution sounded in my voice as I made slow reply.

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“By the power of will in me, I say that tomorrow I shall have a fairly large boil in this exact place on my arm; and YOUR boil shall swell to twice its present size!”

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Morning found me with a stalwart boil on the indicated spot; the dimensions of Uma’s boil had doubled. With a shriek, my sister rushed to Mother. “Mukunda has become a necromancer!” Gravely, Mother instructed me never to use the power of words for doing harm. I have always remembered her counsel, and followed it.

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My boil was surgically treated. A noticeable scar, left by the doctor’s incision, is present today. On my right forearm is a constant reminder of the power in man’s sheer word.

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Those simple and apparently harmless phrases to Uma, spoken with deep concentration, had possessed sufficient hidden force to explode like bombs and produce definite, though injurious, effects. I understood, later, that the explosive vibratory power in speech could be wisely directed to free one’s life from difficulties, and thus operate without scar or rebuke. {FN1-12}

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Our family moved to Lahore in the Punjab. There I acquired a picture of the Divine Mother in the form of the Goddess Kali. {FN1-13} It sanctified a small informal shrine on the balcony of our home. An unequivocal conviction came over me that fulfillment would crown any of my prayers uttered in that sacred spot. Standing there with Uma one day, I watched two kites flying over the roofs of the buildings on the opposite side of the very narrow lane.

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“Why are you so quiet?” Uma pushed me playfully.

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“I am just thinking how wonderful it is that Divine Mother gives me whatever I ask.”

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“I suppose She would give you those two kites!” My sister laughed derisively.

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“Why not?” I began silent prayers for their possession.

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Matches are played in India with kites whose strings are covered with glue and ground glass. Each player attempts to sever the string of his opponent. A freed kite sails over the roofs; there is great fun in catching it. Inasmuch as Uma and I were on the balcony, it seemed impossible that any loosed kite could come into our hands; its string would naturally dangle over the roofs.

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The players across the lane began their match. One string was cut; immediately the kite floated in my direction. It was stationary for a moment, through sudden abatement of breeze, which sufficed to firmly entangle the string with a cactus plant on top of the opposite house. A perfect loop was formed for my seizure. I handed the prize to Uma.

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“It was just an extraordinary accident, and not an answer to your prayer. If the other kite comes to you, then I shall believe.” Sister’s dark eyes conveyed more amazement than her words.

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I continued my prayers with a crescendo intensity. A forcible tug by the other player resulted in the abrupt loss of his kite. It headed toward me, dancing in the wind. My helpful assistant, the cactus plant, again secured the kite string in the necessary loop by which I could grasp it. I presented my second trophy to Uma.

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“Indeed, Divine Mother listens to you! This is all too uncanny for me!” Sister bolted away like a frightened fawn.

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{FN1-2} Spiritual teacher; from Sanskrit root GUR, to raise, to uplift.

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{FN1-3} A practitioner of yoga, “union,” ancient Indian science of meditation on God.

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{FN1-4} My name was changed to Yogananda when I entered the ancient monastic Swami Order in 1914. My guru bestowed the religious title of PARAMHANSA on me in 1935 (see ../chapters 24 and 42).

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{FN1-5} Traditionally, the second caste of warriors and rulers.

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{FN1-6} These ancient epics are the hoard of India’s history, mythology, and philosophy. An “Everyman’s Library” volume, RAMAYANA AND MAHABHARATA, is a condensation in English verse by Romesh Dutt (New York: E. P. Dutton).

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{FN1-7} This noble Sanskrit poem, which occurs as part of the MAHABHARATA epic, is the Hindu Bible. The most poetical English translation is Edwin Arnold’s THE SONG CELESTIAL (Philadelphia: David McKay, 75 cents). One of the best translations with detailed commentary is Sri Aurobindo’s MESSAGE OF THE GITA (Jupiter Press, 16 Semudoss St., Madras, India, $3.50).

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{FN1-8} BABU (Mister) is placed in Bengali names at the end.

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